21 Things I Learned in Israel
The “Land of Milk and Honey” is probably not what you’d imagine
1. Friday is the new Saturday. Saturday is the new Sunday.
2. The women walking around Tel Aviv in high heels and revealing clothing are not street walkers. They just didn’t get the memo.
3. Seeing soldiers using public transportation while carrying automatic weapons is actually comforting.
4. Most of Tel Aviv looks like somebody took the San Fernando Valley and threw up all over it.
5. The train from Tel Aviv to Jerusalem takes twice as long as the bus.
6. The Israeli government invests a great deal of money into bringing young Jewish people on an all expense paid birthright trip, with the hope they will decide to become Israeli citizens, and end up living in poverty.
7. I found pork within an hour of arriving. Chinese restaurants have never let me down.
8. Cab drivers in Israel are some of the worst human beings known to mankind.
9. Most apartments in Jerusalem look like Bin Laden’s compound. And they all have reinforced panic rooms, in case shit goes down.
